A different me

There are days when I just feel normal.
I feel different, but normal.
Open, accepting and hopeful, no matter the emotions.
But there are also days when I feel worthless.
On those days, the pain is so great that it feels like I’ll see the world through grey-tinted glasses for the rest of my life.
I want a hug, I want a support system, I want a different me who would be able to reach out for support without fearing being called super sensitive or too vulnerable.

There are days when I’m bubbly and just fine.
I feel different, but fine.
Compassionate and happy that things are falling into place.
But there are also days when partially healed wounds tear open again.
On those days, little things become huge annoyances or disappointments, sending my emotions into a mess of confusion.
I want my nervous systems to regulate quickly, I want friends saying it’s all ok, I want a different me who would easily be able to tend my inner child and show the little me all the compassion in the world.

There are days when I just feel me.
I feel different, but me.
Different because I’m now a different person.
Healing and recovering from trauma change you.
I’m still me, I’m still normal, I’m still fine.

I’m still me, but a different me.

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